Goodbye 20s…HELLO 30!

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I can not believe that it has been a year since I last posted. Over the last year, I decided to take some time to focus on myself, away from social media. Today is not only my thirtieth birthday, but also a personal beginning; my new year. I wouldn’t be able to start this new journey towards a new decade, without reflecting on the last ten years.

To say that my twenties were easy, would be far from the truth. There are so many things that I have experienced in these last ten years. That I not only have kept bottled inside, but have also helped me to discover new things about myself, that I wasn’t ready to accept. I think one of the biggest challenges anyone in their twenties can face is SELF DOUBT. As you may or may not know self doubt is a feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction. Doubt can also lead to ….Anxiety, Fear, Loneliness, Depression, and Self Hate. Truthfully speaking I have faced every single one of these feelings more than once in my twenties.

Anxiety for me always starts with situations that I can’t control. I am not an individual who likes surprises. I need to know what is at the forefront of the future, as a way to protect myself from being misled or hurt. Anxiety eventually turns into fear, which for me in my early twenties became a consistent cycle. Being a gay male in your twenties , and a black gay male at that is enough to fill anyone with anxiety and fear. I came out when I was 18, and what I thought would be a sense of relief, turned out to be everything but that.

There is something to be said when you wait so long for FREEDOM, and when you finally get it, it leaves you with even more uncertainty, and guilt. I have for so many years felt a since of guilt for living in my truth, and wanting to be comfortable in my skin. But still feeling like an embarrassment to others. This feeling led me to feeling alone for many years and eventually kept me in a quiet state of depression, from the time I was 21-25. Where I didn’t feel loved from family and friends; I looked for in romantic relationships to fill the void.

Anyone that has ever loved and loved hard can recognize, that to LOVE also means that you risk it not being reciprocated. Experiencing this type of love in MOST of my relationships, led me to think that I was unworthy of  being loved, which turned into self hate. Over the years I can remember feeling so depressed and sad that I could barely make it out of bed to face the day, or even want to try.

My biggest lesson on my journey thus far, and in my twenties has been SELF LOVE. As a kid in school we are taught so many things. But the one thing that is missing, which I think is the foundation of whether or not you’ll succeed in life. Is learning how to like, love and accept the image staring  back at us in the mirror. I understand that nothing in life is perfect, or ever goes as planned. Sometimes friends let us down, and hurt us in ways we can’t fathom. Heart break is inevitable, and no one rich, poor, big or small is exempt from feeling such pain. Putting a time on where we think we should or shouldn’t  be in our life is pure torture.. don’t do it to yourself….you’ll thank me later. I thank god for pulling me through some of the hardest days in my twenties, and allowing me to come out on the other side.

There have been so many days where I never thought I would make it to 30. Or when I was down ever wanting to get to this point. I am forever grateful for the Self doubt, heartbreak, loneliness, and depression over these last ten years. All of these things have given me more confidence, in knowing who I am. The type of people I want to be surrounded by, how I choose to give and receive love, and gain clarity on things I Still don’t understand. As I celebrate this new beginning, I can only smile and look to the future. No longer worrying about what’s behind me, but excited to fully live in MY TRUTH, and not make any apologies for it.


My New Year


Happy Friday! Now that the week is finally coming to an end, I am looking forward to the weekend. Yesterday I celebrated my 29th Birthday and as the day went on, I couldn’t help but to reflect on the past year. We all know that we have the “New Year”, but I think of my birthday as my personal  “New Year”. If you are in your twenties or remember anything about being in your twenties, you will know and understand that it is a very difficult time. This past year for me has been very rewarding but not without trying times.

As we get older we begin to discover new things about ourselves. Things that shape us as individuals, that make us grow and become more mature. With growth brings new opportunities, new relationships, and new goals. But it also means that your going to lose some people along the way. In my early twenties I used to be so afraid of losing friendships and relationships. I would be afraid to tell my partner when in a relationship what I needed, because I didn’t value myself enough to know that my opinions mattered. I think everyone has had self doubt a few times in their life, and I am no different. I think this past year I have become more determined to follow my dreams, and to see them through.

I also have seen many individuals that I thought were true friends, and good people show their true colors.  When I think of a friend wether its a best friend, or in a relationship. I think of someone who is trustworthy, dependable, and communicates. I absolutely cringe when I hear people say “with age comes wisdom”, as if being older all of a sudden gives individuals better communication skills. It has to be learned it doesn’t just happen. I also know that in order to have good people in your life you have to maintain those relationships in order for them to work. You can’t say you want something good, and when it comes you don’t put the work in.

Nothing in life is free everything has to be earned. As I enter my last year in my twenties, I want nothing more than to continue to be the best person I can be. I no longer have room to surround myself with anything or anyone, that I feel is holding me back and doesn’t add to me being great. We all have choices in life, and in this moment I’m choosing happiness over sadness. Love over hate and growth over being comfortable. I no longer am afraid to let those in my life know what I need. At the end of the day I am in charge of my own happiness, but I also am in charge of setting boundaries and knowing what I will and won’t accept. Growth is a beautiful thing, and comes with many gifts. I embrace it with open arms and am ready for this new year. 😉

Styled Risks


Happy Friday! I am so glad to finally have made it through yet another week. This week felt extra long with all the humidity in the air. So I decided to step into something familiar, but different to make the week more exciting. I am always happy to try new things, and take risks when it comes to my style. This is what I love about the clothing variety in Samson. You can always find something familiar, but still have new things to try, that you wouldn’t necessarily have imagined. I do love a great short in the summer season, and was surprised to find these cord shorts by JACHS in multiple colors. I do love my neutrals so it was only appropriate that I chose the camel color. One styling tip that I always go by is “classic bottom, trendy top”. I have mentioned this in previous posts, If you choose to go neutral on the bottom, you should choose something fun or trendy to wear on the top.

This rule keeps styling fun while keeping things classic. For my shirt I decided to go with a neutral gray with neutral colored stripes by Jeremiah. I absolutely love the way this particular style fits me, and compliments the cord camel shorts. Which by the way are super comfortable. I was a little afraid that they would be to heavy, because they are a cord, but they are very light weight and not stiff, which gave me lots of room to move. To complete my look I accessorized, with none other than a belt by Tanner Goods, which has become a favorite staple piece in my wardrobe.

I like to think that our individual style, just like unspoken words tells a story about everyone. It can also lead to thoughts of curiosity about the individual wearing them. Each week brings new challenges for me. Often leading me to doubt, and worry about my future. Sometimes our biggest set back in life can be the unknown, and I am no different from having said worry. The one thing that keeps me going through it all, is knowing that no matter which way the wind blows, I know my purpose and am striving each day to overcome anything that will hold me back from fulfilling my dreams. Style as it is in life is all about risks; If we don’t take them we can’t grow. I’m up for the challenge any day… as long as I can do it in style. 😉



Summer Living


Summer has finally arrived, and the living seems just a bit easier, with temperatures at an all time high. I couldn’t help but to be inspired by the thought of being on a beach surrounded by sand, clear skies, and the ocean. My apologies for being away for so long, this season has definitely kept me busier then normal. Just like any classic gentleman, I am always thinking about my next adventure, and since I have the beach on my mind It inspired my idea for the perfect attire for a day in the sun.

When browsing through Samson Men’s Emporium, I found a Navy beach pullover by JACHS. I think a beach pull over is something that most men are afraid to wear, because they may not know how to style it. The pull over can be worn and styled for more than just the beach. I also love to style mine with a colored chino pant or a pair of dark denim. In order to make it more formal in non casual settings. Swim wear this season has been so much fun to style. Especially with all the fun prints in swim trunk styles. I am loving these particular swim trunks by Polonio. The color and print are fun, and they even have the built in underwear, and draw string attached to keep everything in tact. Leaving you feeling and looking your best while laying out by the pool. As you all know I am all about accessories. So I had to add this unique turkish towel by Woven Promises. I like that it is light cotton, and long enough for your whole body to lay out on, by the pool or on the beach.

In this particular moment and season in my life, I am taking the time to enjoy the small things, and not let the stress of the days (sometimes long) get to me. After work I enjoy the company of friends over a cocktail. Or shuffling through the park with my pooch, and enjoying the scent of the flowers in bloom. Or even smiling at the children in the park, playing and laughing with not a care in the world. Almost to envy such innocence that has not yet, been disturbed by the chaotic ways of the world. Even still, I am thankful for this time, place, and being present. Life really is a BEACH and the living is easy, when you do it in style and with class. 😉

Ivy & Green


Happy Monday! Yes… it’s that time again, when the weekend has come to an end , and we have yet another work week ahead. What always makes me feel relieved is knowing, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel after the week has ended. When you can leave all of the weeks stress behind and finally relax, with a calming sense of peace. Until than I have decided to start the week off right. With something classic with my favorite color in mind. The color green has always been my favorite, for as long as I can remember. I think it compliments my skin tone well, and I love all the many shades of the color. Everything from mint green to forest green. In previous years I have not been a fan of short sleeve collard shirts, but must admit they have grown on me. Especially this plaid shirt with hints of green and red by United By Blue. I love how light the cotton is, which is important to me during the warmer seasons when trying to stay cool, but wanting to look my best at the same time.

The best way for me to stay cool in the humidity is to wear linen. I absolutely love all things linen. Not only is it a classic fabric, but it is comfortable and is guaranteed to keep  you cool in the scorching heat. So when choosing a short to pair with my shirt, I discovered these linen olive green shorts by Nifty Genius. I loved how comfortable and light they felt on. I also thought that they complimented the shirt well. Bringing out more of the many shades of green and red within the plaid. I also believe a great pair of sunglasses are important as well. Picking the right pair of shades to compliment the structure of your face is very important. Especially if your going the more expensive designer route. Just like any luxury good a pair of designer sunglasses is an investment, and if chosen properly can be worn for a lifetime.

I am used to wearing an aviator style of sunglasses. I really thought these rounded gold shades by RAEN, were an absolute hit with my look as a whole. I was a little afraid that the shape wouldn’t compliment my face, because the bone structure of my face is more round, but they fit perfectly. To finish off this classic spring look, I decided to add a cross body bag in a dark forest green by Duluth Pack. I love the detailing on this bag, with the dark brown leather trim, and the hardware on the front buckles. This will definitely be a classic favorite of mine. I do want to mention how fun it was shooting this look in front of the green ivy. If you didn’t know.. Ivy grows on trees and natural man made structures. Climbing at least 30 m above the ground, with the vibrant shade of green, which attracts wild life and can be used in planting spaces. As well on tall or wide concrete walls for decorative purposes. Just like ivy, I have learned the power of speaking positive vibes into my life and watch it grow and come to fruition. When we speak things into existence it reflects in our attitude, which reflects in our style. Before we know it everything around us changes, spreading wide and giving us hope that anything is possible if we believe. 😉

A Doubt Rearranged


I don’t know about you, but I love a good coffee table read. I love finding good coffee table reads, in the most unexpected places. Like a local home goods, or a half priced book store. Just as anything good in life, the best things are found in the most unexpected places, and are always special. When piecing everything together, I of course wanted something classic, but also something that was fresh, and cool with trendy elements.  Since I consider my style to be classic trendy, I really wanted the look to reflect that concept. I decided on a light pink salmon chino pant by Nifty Genius, and a classic fitting polo by Jeremiah. I will say that I am normally not a fan of classic fitting anything, because it tends to be non form fitting, which is how I like my attire to fit.

At first I was struggling with wether or not the boxy fit of the polo, complimented my body. So I decided to tuck it in to give it more shape, and decided to layer it with this amazing cotton bomber jacket by Singer + Sargent. Adding the jacket definitely adds that piece of trend I was going for, and compliments the color of the chinos well. With Spring now upon us, I chose a classic boat shoe in brown by Rancourt & Co. During the warmer seasons, I love a classic style boat shoe or leather driving moccasin, and penny loafer. Not only are they comfortable, and durable but can be worn formal or casual.

Just as I normally do, I played around the Samson Men’s Emporium Shop for great new finds to piece together. I must admit, this particular week was a little different. As I stated earlier when it came to the polo, I was having DOUBT. For anyone that has ever gone through doubts, you’ll know that the true definition of doubt is ” a feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction.”  I was uncertain if the fit of the polo would compliment me well, and or ruin the entire look. But just as we have to sometimes in life, I was determined to make it work and rearrange a few things, in order to make my vision reality. The lesson being; we all have doubts and they are nothing more than FEAR… “False Evidence Appearing Real”, and in those moments we shouldn’t give up on our dreams and abilities. But simply stop take a breath and rearrange those negative thoughts, and believe in our unique purpose. 🙂


Something Casual


Finally the week is coming to a close and I can begin to focus on weekend plans, and of course casual but classic styles, to brunch and run errands in. As I have said before I am a creature of habit, and my style is no different. But I am also the type of guy that likes and wants variety in everything, especially when it comes to my style and the specific looks I choose. I am a lover of comfortable sweatshirts and sweaters, that come in different styles. Hoodies,cardigans, and half zips are a dime a dozen in my closet. They are easy to layer with, and pop over your favorite v-neck or crew neck solid t-shirt, and even look great with a more formal buttoned shirt. I own many cardigans with pockets, and some without. I have sweatshirts with hoods, and some that have a zipper attached to the sleeve. Great style is all about variety and having choices to fit ones mood, which for me varies from day to day.

Great style should always speak for the individual, and never be compromised. So I decided to step into something a little more casual, than what you normally would see me in. While playing in Samson Men’s Emporium, I wanted a casual look but something not as formal as I said earlier. So I found this amazing short sleeve sweatshirt, with a pocket by JACHS. I love how it fits the body, and that its NAVY..surprise…surprise..LOL. I chose a light wash denim by Jean Shop, because I’ve always thought of light wash denim to be more casual, and dark wash to be more formal and or business casual. Since I love brown leather I had to add one by Tanner Goods. I am all about accessories, so I didn’t think my casual look was complete without adding a few to compliment it. So I paired a neutral colored hat by Grizzly Springs, and a pair of RAEN sunglasses.

I hope you all enjoy the weekend and take some time to relax, and enjoy doing some things that you like doing. If you have time please comment below, and let me know your thoughts on my posts. I always love to hear from and get to know new faces. Remember….”Style is a reflection of your attitude and your personality-SA,”, so wear it well! 😉